Love, every relationship revolves around this fancy word. I don’t even believe that the meaning of this word, Love exists, because for me, Love could mean everything, and anything. Curiosity knocked me for some times, and foolishly I've responded by mistake with some deceiving characteristics it showed. At this moment, I know I’ve finally found the right woman to share with this mysterious feeling. Complicated and impossible this may seem, lot of things are going so wrong, and I honestly don’t know yet how I could work this out, but all know is that it feels so right. And everything’s going to be all right. Miracles happens everyday.
In the first place, how could you/we know that what we’re feeling is love? How exactly it is to love someone? How can we say we’re giving justice to the word love? Here are some characteristics I could give you to define “true love”; let’s specify it as true, because love can be faked too. If you want to show real love to someone, keep these words somewhere with you.
Firstly, love is sure kind, it seeks to encourage and build up others. It respects the feelings and emotions of one another... It finds its greatest satisfaction in making others happy. Kindness can be seen when you give one another things such as gifts and encouragement cards. Complement each other; magnify the other party’s strength, instead of trying hard to change him/her. Sometimes, just listen. Listen to one another. Pay close attention to what each of you has to say and make each other feel that what each says is important.
Obviously, true love is proud. So treat one another special in public. Compliment and encourage one another sincerely in the presence of others. Doing this passively provides assurance and comfort. Both of you is feeling so wonderful about yourselves. Love is not jealous.Jealousy usually indicates an insecure and immature heart. Love wants the best for others, but jealousy is possessive. Jealous is reflected in the childish statement, “If he is going to talk to her, then he can just forget about me!” and often, one person wants to totally own the other and restrict his/her relationships with others…
Love is not about bragging. It’s not airy and is never to impress. Most of the times, one tends to always think how to please the other, trying to show nice impressions that’s really unnecessary – because a man who is true to himself, however, does not need to exalt himself, others will praise him. Love is not arrogant; it’s not conceited, boastful, cocky, or stagnant, instead, is humble and has a servant attitude. Sometimes, your partner may come to threaten you with the “I can take you or leave you” attitude – that sarcastically implies, “You should be thankful that somebody as me is just so patient with you.” (Pasalamat ka nagtitiis pa ako sa tulad mo.) Of course, this is not love! Love always covers - this word cover means to pass over in silence; to keep confidential, to have another’s trust and confidence, and sometimes indicates intimacy.
Love is patient with the mistakes of others. It doesn't criticize, interrogate and brag to the other or to the world the faults his/her partner committed, true love should stay, even when it knows the other is not perfect… Love always perseveres. Love always stands its ground and hold on. It will endure anything.It will even love in the face of unrequited (one-sided) love;real love will last and grew though all sorts of trials, complications and stress. Love is never provoked; this means that love has a long fuse. It does not become irritated and angry. It is not easily offended… Love does not seek its own. This is the heart of love. Love is other-centered rather than self- centered. Love says, “I love you, I always want to love you.” Selfishness says, “I love you, I want you!” Love does not act recklessly. This means that love does not behave clumsy, immoral or shameful. It does not embarrass others by its action. It is characterized by tact and sensitivity. This also means that love should have good manner. For the guys, let’s give justice to the word gentleman, and for the gals, always act conservatively.
Lastly, Love is forgiving; it keeps no record of wrongs. This is a MUST for a successful love story. If someone is not willing to forgive and forget with the most little mistakes, he/she is not exhibiting love. One must not hold grudges when it has been wronged. It doesn’t remain resentful. Remember this: Love forgets past failures and sins.
I am grateful if you’d reach this part of this piece of crap, and I hope you’ve learned a little with all this drama. Or the least, I made you smile, laugh, doubt or think of someone – without you knowing it.
Falling in Love is quite easy… Sustaining being In Love is a challenge, But getting over a Love, you don’t ever want to end is suicide…
Almost everyone would agree that maintaining a good relationship is hard. Not just hard I guess. From one’s ability to engage and handle conflicts effectively, to figuring out how to balance your time well, to constructing messages and conversations to reveal our darkest sides skillfully to make one accept it; trying to make a relationship succeed sure was exhausting at times. And, have you ever forgotten to consider all of the routine activities that we engage in to maintain our bond? We may not even realize it when we're doing it, but many daily occurrences have a significant impact of the status and stability of a relationship. Respect those who can give you time despite of their tight schedule… But truly love those, who don’t even see their schedule when you need them. Conversation for instance a very normal way of communicating, yet if we only look carefully-talking and listening to each other about the day's ups and downs really have an important role in gaining positive emotions we both share and the feelings of closeness – sense of being at ease with you, and you to me, this is not just limited to our end-of-day discussions, all of those other little chats through out the day counts too. Whether we're telling each other our simplest whereabouts, our time spent with some specific person and how our mood was, discussing our plans for the rest of the day and in the morrow were all important, those routine talk is beneficial to our relationship in more ways than one; yes we're not even committed, and maybe you're thinking I'm being too much here making you feel obliged of such things. But this is not about commitment, but about a relationship- however you might call ours... Everyone can hear you; some may have the time to talk to you. But only few know how to listen. Presence; a very important matter to keep a relationship working, spending some time together by doing things with one another, grabbing a bite to eat, going on vacation, or even watching a movie on the couch together all have the ability to strengthen a relationship but we never had it, we cannot have it.. Not yet, but not never, am I right? I may look like a fool being so stubborn and you may have felt fed up of how I’m trying to stay in touch with you… But this is the least that we could do to at least maintain the feelings… They say that romance keeps half of the foundation of a relationship, and since we are not yet able to have some romance to sustain to, I must say, our bond is weak – the spark you’d felt from the start may easily fade… But putting positivity in it, maybe if only we could stand strong and work through this kind of relationship steady with just half the foundation, what more if the time comes that finally we could be together?
Patience, I have enough of it to keep on going, with no one else but you… Finding someone to fall in love with is nice… But finding someone who would keep you falling in love even after you’ve fallen, is irreplaceable.
Offering assurances is an excellent way to increase feelings of satisfaction, happiness, and liking, telling your partner how you feel about him or her and about your relationship can enhance the quality of your bond. Whether you're saying "I love you" or showing your partner that you're committed by telling him or her that you're "in it to win it," That is why I keep on reminding you how much I feel, and I never will get tired of expressing it. Yes I cannot prove it yet, I cannot give you much of an stable assurance, but I know that I’ve nothing to gain asking you to believe in a lie, I’m just being honest to myself. I always will. You may not see it; you may not feel it… But I know deep within me, You’re going to be the last woman that I’ll ever love.
They say, that the most important tactic or practice for maintaining ongoing romantic involvements- and one that is more commonly overlooked- is Positivity, Optimism. One simply cannot overstate the significance of approaching interactions with one another with a positive frame of mind, and doing what you can to lift a partner's spirits on a daily basis through sweet statements, notes, corny jokes, etc. Honestly I am not a positive person, I pity myself and I seldom appreciate the things around me. I have my own world, in solitary. I had relationships, but most of the times I would care less on maintaining the feelings and fixing the problems for them, I’m not patient enough. But as we had our relationship, I learned to be the most optimistic and realistic person for you. I may feel bad, complain and try to change your mind sometimes but I always respect your every decision. I know I’m not perfect, am no good. I’m not even forcing you to be as positive as me, but I keep on asking you for one thing; If you cannot go on for some moments, let me carry you, but don’t walk back. If you cannot believe something, it doesn't mean that I’m telling a lie. A little affection is enough, because I might always come positive, but similarly, the damage wrought by complaining, insulting, sulking, and other forms of your negativity is profound and poisonous to us – and it deeply hurts me. Instead to despise that the roses have thorns, You could appreciate that the thorns have roses.
Including a little humor into our daily routine is a wonderful addition to any relationship. Playful teasing, inside jokes, and even joking during arguments should help keep relationships going and maybe even help to repair some that may be heading otherwise. And Like I’ve said, humor is also a way to say something serious, know when you should laugh, try to listen sometimes. Same as your dear friend have told you, you could appreciate someone more, when you let them speak, and you start listening, without laughing. If you can’t share a laugh with your man, You can’t share a life, together…
I don’t intend on writing this to give you sermons or to conscience you. I’m just sharing, and expressing. Cause for now, talks can’t be enough, explanations won’t suffice, and having some opportunity to speak with you doesn’t always mean I will be understood.
Guys are expert in NOTHING, but we must be practiced in many things. SKILLS! We don’t have to master them all at once. We simply have to collect and develop a certain number of skills as days tick by.
We Should Be Able To:
1.Throw a Punch – Knowing how to throw a good punch when the situations calls for it wouldn’t mark our reputation. Rule of thumb: Swing with your shoulders, not your arm. Forget about a roundhouse punch or haymaker, we’re not Manny Pacquiao.If you can strike hard enough using the heel of your palm, go with it. It serves the same purpose.
With this thin arms of mine, nah.. I know I couldn’t throw a punch, and I’ve been taking care of my hand since birth, for my talent preservation purposes? lolx But if it comes to self-defense, am sure am not a lowbie.. Instead to punch, I kick. I’m training taekwondo, footwork-so I guess I’ve an edge- running fast? haha
2.Name a good book – Twilightdoesn’t count. Sorry.
Whew, our old house was a junk shop of reading materials-from books, to magazines, encyclopedia, newspapers etc. That made me a boy who’s interested in the wild-life. I’m not into science.. errr
3.Commute – Learn how to commute. There’s nothing sexier to a woman than having a man on her side with a good sense of direction. Trust me.
Like that’s my life, I want to travel someday. I never stayed a long week just steady at home. More than commuting, I must say I love walking and biking more.
4.Shuffle a deck of cards – Come on! Don’t even try to play cards with a girl and ask her to shuffle it for you. It doesn’t work. Practice how to do it now!
Can I say pass? I really don’t play cards.
5.Speak to an 8 year-old – Use his first name. Don’t use baby talk. Don’t crank up your energy to match his. Don’t pretend to be interested inPower Rangers,Gundam XorStreet Fighter. He’s as bored with that shit as you are. Concentrate instead on seeing the child as a person of his own.
Mommy said, don’t talk to strangers! I mean, I’m not the man to tell stories or to entertain kids. But I’m not a snob, maybe when the chance knocks me to be jolly and keep a company of a kiddo, why not? Hmm I guess I’ve some experience- more with some childish people out there, who’s that? hehe
6.Say NO.
As a son, brother or to strangers- No means no. I don’t even lift a finger to do things I don’t want to do. Who are you? Should I care? But its different, maybe the exact opposite when it comes to those few who made me think am their friend, to those who matters to me, especially to someone I love. I can’t just say no to favors, and all.
7.Give advice that matters in ONE SENTENCE –Make sure your advice makes sense. Like.. “When in doubt, don’t” or “When nobody has your back, you gotta move your back.” Give them the best advice they’ll ever get. One sentence - Boom.
I know I can give advices; I speak seldom but you must be sure you’ll listen. Some say I can be a psychologist, but most says am a psycho..freak. Well, I could care less. Too few we’re able to hear me – and much fewer listens.
8.Tell if someone is lying – Everyone has his technique in catching a liar. But not all of them work. Liars change the subject almost instantaneously. Liars look up and to their right when they speak. Liars will sometimes stare dead straight into your eyes and employ a dead face. Just pick one and test it.
Most guys need no effort on this. Usually, guys are gifted with pretty good instincts, and I’ve proven it already a lot of times. Sometimes it’s passive, when am not even aware what I am thinking about something/someone was right. As for women, their intuitions are quite impressive –but most of the times, went too much far to being judgmental and worst; paranoid.
9.Swim –at least three different strokes.Doggy paddlewon’t cut it. Learn two more. LOL
I love swimming, I want to stay in the pool and swim alone. Since I’m not into partying, mingling, videoke nor “Inuman” during swimming night outs.
10.Console a crying woman – Keep a handkerchief on your person. A clean one, since it’s not for you. Never approach a woman who is merely weeping or teary. Say “I’m sorry to disturb you, but is there anything I can do to help?” Whether she responds or not, offer the folded handkerchief. Point out that it’s clean. This should make her laugh. If she tells you to go away, do so immediately. If she says she’s fine tell her to keep the hanky.
I hate this, and to be into some crying situations – specially when I know I’m involved. I’m not good comforting a crying woman; I would rather play numb and just let her be. Crying as far as I believe is their biggest “blackmail”, ever! But it’s inevitable, can’t just avoid it. So, I would try the least that I could to be a “man”. hehe
I am John Emmanuel M. Perez, or Joemm for short. Working as a freelance Graphic Artist. A proud visual and media artist. You're reading my heart out through my writing, articles and poetry in this Blog.
-Solitary makes my existence-
prohibi†ed
